Popcorn Muscles

AIG signs multimillion-dollar deal to sponsor President Obama’s bracket

In College Basketball, People more important than Jesus, People probably on steroids, Suspected porn enthusiasts, Teams nobody cares about on March 19, 2009 at 23:39

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Leader of the free world and former high school varsity team backup President Barack Obama released his NCAA Tournament bracket today in hopes of distracting the general public from those pesky issues of Wall Street, foreclosures and a two-front war. What was lost in all the hard-hitting coverage of the mainstream media, though, was AIG’s recent $30 million-deal to sponsor the bracket and receive prominent placement on that nifty poster board as the president stood next to ESPN’s Andy Katz.

“We figured that if Citigroup can hold on to the naming rights of the new Mets stadium, then we would be crazy not to spend all that new capital we just received on some good PR,” said Hamburglar, AIG’s newest CEO, in at a make believe press conference held at a local McDonald’s Playland. “I’m not really sure what the White House is going to do with the money, but I heard Emmanuel Rahm mention something about ‘taking care’ of Rush Limbaugh.”  

When reached for comment, a White House spokesman said, “Oh s*#@! Um, well, the President has suggested that the government think about giving 50% of the bonus, er, fee back to AIG.”

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