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Top Football Recruit Stops For Gas At Notre Dame on Way To Visit University Of Florida

In dangers to society, Draft Busts, Embarrassments to humanity, Evil Empire, People you'll never hear about in seven months, Suspected porn enthusiasts, Teams nobody cares about, Teams that never cover the spread, Teams with Fat Coaches, University of Notre Dame on April 14, 2009 at 16:20

Notre Dame Gas Station


On a recent recruiting trip to Gainesville, five star offensive tackle recruit James Hurst stopped to fill up his Mazda Miata just outside the Ron Powlus Center for Disappointment at the University of Notre Dame.

“I actually didn’t know they had a football team,” said the Indiana native in a fictitious interview. “My Grandpa used to talk about Fighting Irish football winning national championships, but he had Alzheimers so I assumed it was sort of like his theory about the fake moon landing or Montreal baseball.”

Hurst, who had his gas tank filled up by Junior Pump Specialist Rick Mirer, was reportedly impressed with the shiny gold dome in the middle of the campus, and even told a friend that he hoped the mid-major program would one day be able to compete with schools like Syracuse and Air Force.


Written by David Breitman

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